Self control
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Your belief about how self-control works become
a self-fulfilling prophecy
o
If you think your willpower is limited, youll
fel depleted after exercising self-control
o
If you believe your willpower is unlimited,
youll feel energized by self-control tasks
·
You can gradually change your beliefs to become
more unlimited
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Do you have to or do you want to?
o
Reconsider whether its worth wasting your time
and effort on something you don’t really want to do in the first place
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Strategies
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Temptation bundling
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TV, favourite podcase, music -> in
combination with chores like dish washing, laundry, workout
o
Limit yourself and exlude options
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No alerts / push notifications
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No social media apps
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App block / time restrictions
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Phone on silent / in another room
o
Adjust your identity to prevent self-control
failures
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“I am…” fit / a sportsmen / a marathon runner
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Indulging in temptations would incur a cost to
your self-image
§
“Every action you take is a vote for the kind of
person you wish to become”
o
Think broadly about a choice
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Think of your choice (whether to indulge or not9
not as a one-shot decision, but as a
sequence of habitual decisions
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Always ask yourself: what will be the
consequences if I indulge every time?
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Realize that in the future you likely wont
change much – youll be equally tempted to indulge as youre now and you wont
have more willpower or resources to deal with temptations than you have now
§
Ask yourself – what would my older self ask me
to do better now?
o
“rephrase” your thinking
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Instead of “Oh a yummy cake” think “hmm, what a
fattening piece of high-calorie, vein-clogging dessert”
o
Decide once – in general rules – vs over and
over again
§
Eg. “I don’t eat desserts” vs deciding against
it at every meal
§
“I eat from the salad/veggie bar in canteen” as
a general rule. Then you don’t have to consider your choice, decide against the
5 other options actively,…
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On decision making
o
Whenever making an important decision, get
yourself into a high-level (=abstract) construal by asking yourself a series of
“why” questions
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Want to lose weight!
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“Why”?
o
More attractive
§
Why?
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Do this until you’ve connected to your deepest
values (because is gives me great joy, because I deeply value my life etc.)
o
(This works great! I did not do a career choice
for reasons of money or possible power (i.e. climbing to leadership) for itself
as money / power does not interest me – I am interested in learning, observing,
and my priority of taking care for family and spending/having time is higher
than “job”)
